Thank the Gods I was a Girl Scout

And not only that I was a Girl Scout, but that I was one of those Girl Scouts that actually went camping. A lot. I know there are ex-Scouts out there and probably current Scouts that never camp. Me on the other hand, I spent a massive chunk of time at Camp Edey. I lived full summers at Edey as a camp counselor in my teens. 1990 staff, I still love you with all my heart!

I think the way I feel about Camp Edey, in Bayport, Long Island is probably how some immigrants feel about their native countries. Its the 'Motherland.' I probably bonded with the place on my inaugural camping trip when I was in first grade; a Brownie would be the technical term. I apparently thought it was a great idea to sleep walk along the edge of the lake on the very first night and scare the shit out of my mother and the rest of the leaders - even the seasoned ones. Poor little me in my pink nightgown ( my mother was yet to be skilled in how to dress for outdoor living) tried to wake up my "buddy" to walk to the bathroom, as per the rules but she wouldn't get up. Seven year old me probably said, "If you won't wake up, buddy, I'll walk there myself!" And I wonder where Aidan gets his 'tude from. I must have fallen asleep standing outside the tent because that's the last thing I remember before my mother picked me up and brought me to the bath house. No, actually I have one fleeting memory of wandering through brush.

Back to my renewed thankfulness of my Girl Scout camping experiences. As of this evening, the bugs are coming out in droves in the house. Oh, and the mice. And let's not forget the bats. Maybe they knew Scott was leaving this morning. Maybe they said to each other, "She's going to be lonely. Let's hang out with her! Introduce her to the locals!" Or maybe it was more sinister like, "Let's freak the newbie out. She ain't seen bugs like us!"

However, I got three words for them - Bug Wax Museum.

Oh, yes. The Bug Wax Museum. I could add mice to that, and bats if they don't stay out of my hair. It's very simple to make actually, and could be useful as a sort of 'warning' to other bugs and rodents that I don't fuck around. In the case you feel this would be either a useful item or a conversation piece for your house, the following items are all you need to create your own Bug Wax Museum.

- large citronella candles
- sturdy paper or foam core
- a marker

You want to get those citronella candles in the buckets. This gives you a decent sized flame plus lots of surface area to give those bugs a good landing pool. Poor things really can't help it, even when scores of their brethren are floating in the hot melted wax, they still can't stay away from the flame. 

All you do is light it up and wait. Before long you'll have your first museum acquisitions. Just fish them out of the wax after they die, maybe with a stick or something and drop them on to your board. You may require extra wax to really adhere them to it, but don't use too much otherwise you'll obscure your art. After that, you can use your marker to individually name them with either their real species names, or get creative and give them people names. Camp Edey style was to go with the latter.

Then again, there's the side of me that wants to remain kind. I'm hearing the song from Miss Spider and her Sunny Patch Friends that goes 'Be good to bugs, be good to bugs, be gooooood to bugs!!!"

I saved a spider the other day. And it was pretty creepy looking. Dime sized and fuzzy, it also had green fangs. Yep, green fangs. I looked him up after I caught him in a cup with a plate for a lid - he was the Phidippus Audax, otherwise known as the Bold Jumper. He was harmless as well as relatively small, unlike the one in the kitchen tonight that I trapped under a cup and had Scott deal with. And he was kind of cute, in a spidery kind of way. But still, back off, bro. K?

Something oblong just flew by my head. It was as if it was saying, 'Back off? Back off!? How's this for back off?"

I whacked it with the back of a hair brush. How's that for dead?